How to Dismiss Someone — A Practical Guide

🌟 Editor's Note

🚩 The problem starts before the dismissal

Most dismissals fail because the problem isn't the final conversation.
It's everything that happened before:

• Feedback that wasn't given

• Expectations that weren't clarified

• Processes that weren't followed

And the consequences extend afterwards:

• In the team's memory

• In how the person speaks about the company

• In your own perception as a leader

🗺️ Know your country's rules

In the UK and European Union, and even most countries outside the US,
there's no such thing as "you're fired".

To lawfully terminate a contract, you typically have these options:

1. Disciplinary procedure
Requires formal notification, evidence, legal process and a clear breach of contract.

2. Mutual agreement
Must be consensual, documented, signed and usually compensated.

3. Probationary period termination
The scenario where employers have more flexibility — even so, written notice is recommended.

4. Redundancy
Must follow proper consultation processes and selection criteria.

📌 Fundamental rules:

• Always consult legal before acting

• Communicate your intentions to the employee before formal action

• Don’t assume American practices apply elsewhere

✅ Checklist: are you ready to begin?

Ask yourself:

• Have I provided regular, written feedback?

• Did the person know expectations — and fail to meet them?

• Have I tried coaching, support or adaptation first?

• Have I spoken to HR and/or legal before this?

• Am I acting from principle — or frustration?

🤝 The best exits aren't surprises

Even during probation, where no legal justification is required,
a clean exit is never abrupt.

• Tell people where they stand

• Give feedback that builds clarity

• Let the other person see the signals coming

🧭 How to structure the conversation

A simple 4-part flow — designed to be respectful, legally neutral, and adaptable across countries:

1. Communicate the decision

"We’ve decided to bring this collaboration to an end."
or
"We’re concluding your contract as of today, following internal review."

2. Reference the context (brief and factual)

"We’ve had several conversations over time regarding expectations and development."
"Unfortunately, the improvement hasn’t been sufficient to continue this working relationship."

3. Explain next steps (logistics + support)

"Here’s what will happen next regarding access, compensation, and documentation."
"If needed, we’ll walk you through the administrative and legal formalities."

4. Hold space for reaction

Stay calm. Don’t rush. Don’t argue.

"I understand this may be a lot to take in. You’re welcome to ask questions or take a moment."

If needed:
"We can schedule time with HR or legal if you want to review any details formally."🛑 What NOT to say

❌ “This hurts me too”
❌ “It’s not personal”
❌ “You’re a great person, but…”
❌ “This is just how things are”

✅ Instead:

• Say less

• Be clear

• Stick to facts

• Preserve dignity without making promises

🧱 Post-exit communication: protect the team and culture

How you speak about someone who's left
signals everything to those who remain.

• Be respectful — but not mysterious

• Be clear — but not cruel

• Be brief — but not silent

🌀 The emotional reality

Even in the cleanest exit, people experience a version of the change curve:

Shock → Denial → Anger → Sadness → Acceptance

• Handle it with honesty, and you accelerate healing

• Avoid discomfort, and you prolong it — for everyone

🤝 Don’t face this alone

Whether you're the one being dismissed or managing someone's exit,
don’t rely solely on friends or family.

You need someone who understands:

• Employment law

• Compensation rules

• What can or cannot be signed under pressure

• What’s fair vs. what’s convenient for the company

🧠 Final thoughts

Dismissing someone well requires preparation, legal awareness, and emotional intelligence.
It’s not about being soft — it’s about being serious.

The conversation itself is just one moment.
Your credibility as a leader depends on everything you did before it,
and everything you do after.

📘 Bonus: the full tactical handbook for real-world exits

This week’s newsletter includes a downloadable 15-slide tactical playbook!

🧰 Use it before your next hard conversation.

Thanks for reading.
Sharing is Caring — make sure friends, managers and founder get better prepared.